Break the Cycle (Part 1)
When I was growing up, my family didn’t have very much money. We had all the necessities we needed (food, water, shelter, clothing), but not much else. My parents lived paycheck to paycheck and money was always tight. We lived in apartments most of my life and moved about nine times before I was a senior in high school.
My parents used money as an excuse for everything. Even to this very day, money is brought up constantly. “We don’t have money for this” or “we don’t have any money to do that” or “do you know how much that’s going to cost us?” were excuses I heard constantly. I absolutely hated living like that. It was depressing, demoralizing, and frustrating.
During my senior year of high school, my parents asked me one day what I was going to do after I graduated. I ignorantly replied, “Don’t you have money saved up for me to go to college?” They both looked at each other and bursted out laughing right in my face. Stupidly, I thought they had some sort of college fund set aside for me. I figured since my brother never went to college, my parents should have had even more money they could use towards my education. My parents then said, and I will never forget, “What extra money do you think we have?” This was a turning point for me that shaped my entire financial future/life.
I felt disrespected. I felt embarrassed. I felt unloved and unappreciated. How could my parents not have any money for me to go to college to better myself? How could they have let me down after everything I did for them? I was a very disciplined kid, I didn’t get into trouble, never had any run-ins with the police, I had good grades, I was in AP classes, barely skipped class, played varsity sports, etc. Where was my reward? Where was my thank you? Why didn’t my parents want to set me up for long term success?
For the next few months after our fateful conversation, I tried to figure out what I was going to do post high school. I had no idea what to do and I was lost. I had no direction and no guidance from home because no one in my immediate family had attended college. I didn’t know or understand how to apply for college nor did I grasp the concept of student loans and how they worked. By the time I finally asked some of my closest friends and their parents what to do, it was already too late to apply.
One day I saw an ad in the newspaper for a job fair being held at the local strip mall over the weekend. I thought to myself this was the only option I had to do something with my life once I graduate from high school. So I put on my best dress attire, grabbed a pen and paper, and headed to the job fair… (to be continued)
Disclaimer: I started this blog as more of a therapeutic journal to document and share my life with others who are interested in listening. My blog posts will solely be based on my thoughts, opinions, and experiences as I work on my own path towards Mental Wealth. As I acquire new information along the way, my stance may change to reflect the new things I’ve learned. I, too, am a work in progress so please be patient, be kind, and bear with me. Thank you. - CM